Post by Deleted on Nov 28, 2021 12:17:32 GMT -7
VIP: It's been some time since I've been sitting here as the voice of a wrestling broadcast, but ladies and gentlemen. This. Is. Epoch! On a night headlined by a returning Esme fresh off Final Countdown to take on WMD, I couldn't imagine a bigger way to kick things into high gear. Before then, tis the season, though, and we've got a Thanksgiving Dinner Fight with Justice Cross, Olivia Blue, and Meg Coleman. I can't wait to see who's gonna get pie-faced tonight!
Daewon: My name’s Daewon Lee, and the gentleman beside me is Vance Isaac Parker! We’re both excited for a great night tonight! But up first, we've got a tag team match with a pair of snakes versus Zoey Belle and Chelsey Skye! This one’s highly anticipated, isn’t it VIP?
VIP: That marks a lot of first timers to our brand, yes? I’m always excited to see what new faces bring to the table. I can't believe Justice is gonna waste perfectly good food tonight, though. Especially pumpkin pie...I’m throwing a flag for pumpkin abuse!
Daewon: I’d rather it be key lime!
VIP: Mmm, key lime. That might rank in my fave five of pie. Ahead of their main event contest, Esme Thunder has some words to say. We'll take you there now.
Daewon: I wonder what kind of pie Esme likes most.
We head backstage, where we see Esme Thunder, dressed in a wife-beater and camo shorts, standing by. Her husband, the former Ultimate Conquest Champion, Luther Thunder, is conspicuous by his absence.
Esme: My name is Esmeralda Thunder, and there is a lot of buzz about my “debut” here tonight at the second Epoch show. The thing is, and SRW’s marketing department may not thank me for pointing this out... this isn’t actually my SRW debut. I wrestled Coda as a surprise replacement for Luther a few weeks ago. Now I wouldn’t normally point this out, but it is actually very relevant to why I am here tonight. Because after that match, Coda acted with complete indignation that she didn’t come to SRW to fight “people like me,” as though I was some nobody walking in after flipping burgers in a food truck. Now Coda is not the first person to scoff and belittle me over the past couple of years, it has actually been more frequent an event than I would care to admit. But this was the straw that broke the camel’s back, so to speak. A moment that gave me a sense of clarity about myself, my future, and my own career.
She shakes her head.
Esme: I’m sure you’ve all noticed, but my husband is a very good professional wrestler. Elite, you might say. You may not like him or the way he does business, but he’s one of the very best. And over the past few years, I have primarily dedicated my energies and efforts into supporting him and making him the most dominant force he can be. But if you think I’m just some pretty woman on the side, arm candy... then you are very incorrect. I am a wrestler, too, a damn good one in my opinion... heck, my early career mirrors Luther’s in many ways. A heavy to the guy in charge, doing what we were told and doing it damn well. The difference is... Luther transcended that role, becoming one of the elite people in this sport in his own right. Obviously, I had a lot to do with that too, but... Coda’s words made me realize that I’ve put my own career, my own goals, and aspirations on the backburner for too long. Because everyone just sees me as “Luther Thunder’s wife.” Which is fine, but... I’m so much more than that.
She grins.
Esme: Love... it does strange things to us all. I love Luther, of course, and I won’t pretend for a second that he’s the same person at home that he is when the cameras are rolling... but as far as how people are when thrust into the limelight... do not think because you think you know Luther, that you know me. As a manager and valet, I will support my husband and follow his vision, something my opponent tonight WMD does with his own son, I am sure. But I know the legend of WMD, and I know how CCM does business is not how WMD historically did business. And how Luther Thunder does business is not how I do business. Luther is very cerebral, he plays a lot of mind games. Me? I’ll walk up to you, punch you in the face and have a great time doing it. I kinda like to boil wrestling down to its simplest elements; boy meets girl, girl punches boy in the face and slams him, girl pins boy for a three count. People look at my husband and think he is pretentious, that he can be insincere, and while I would never comment on such opinions one way or the other, I can assure you full well that with me, what you see is what you get. I don’t need to pretend. I don’t need to play the big bad. I love wrestling because of the rush of the fans’ cheers, the thrill of competition. I don’t need any funny business, sneak attacks because if I walk out to that ring and end up wearing my ass for a hat, as long as we all had fun, does it really even matter? Some may be all about titles and glory and fame, but for me? I just want to have a good time and enjoy myself.
She chuckles.
Esme: So Mr. Millar Sr... we’ve had our little jabs back and forth no doubt, as your son and my husband played out their little dick-measuring contests, but I don’t go into this match full of malice, especially. Because seeing you in that managerial role, doing everything to make sure your kid gets over... I get that. I feel that. I am at one with that energy. You know what it is to make a sacrifice, to put yourself to one side to support those you love. But tonight? Tonight, finally, it is our time to shine. I may not put you in the hospital like Ursula did. But I will put you on a pedestal as we show the SRW faithful that we are more than just a supporting cast. Once again, my name is Esmeralda Thunder... so let’s get this party started!
She smirks, clapping her hands together as we head away.
VIP: You think it's safe to say she's here fighting for herself?
Daewon: Yes, I do! What do you think about Esme’s chances here tonight? You’re the wrestler between the two of us. She’s not typically an in-ring performer, but we all know she knows how to talk fans into the building.
VIP: Anyone with that much to say is clearly not one to be taken for granted. I hope WMD is ready for that.
Daewon: Me too, Vance. It’ll be a tough one for sure.
VIP: Don't touch that dial. We've got our first contest of the evening coming right up!
SPECIAL GUEST: CHELSEA SKYE
TAG TEAM MATCH
ZOEY BELLE & CHELSEA SKYE VS THE TWIN SNAKES
Zoey Belle gives Chelsea Skye a playful kiss on the cheek from the apron while Jonna Austin, representing the Twin Snakes, doesn’t look like she’s here to play games! The two women step to the center of the ring with determination in their eyes when “The Loveable Punk” makes the first move. The two trade shots, their punches and kicks quick and heavy until Chelsea uses her quickness and positioning to gain an advantage. Ducking a Hell On Heels high roundhouse kick, Skye hits a clean leg takedown and mounts Chelsea with her legs on both sides of Austin. Zoey makes a sly comment from her corner that more than likely sexualizes the encounter before Chelsea starts to pound her fists down on Jonna. The punches lack precision and technique, but she puts as much of her body weight into them as she can nevertheless.
VIP: Skye with a clean take down, and the mount, but something tells me Zoey wished she was on the other side of that! Jonna doesn’t look to be enjoying this mount near as much, however, c’mon protect yourself man!
Skillfully, Austin blocks her head like a clamshell when Chelsea starts to knock her fists into Jonna’s stomach. With a grunt of fury, the Twin Snake turns the pair over so it’s Chelsea on her back! Jonna lowers herself to hook the legs, sitout pinning Skye briefly. Kickout! Now lifted into a powerbomb position, she bounces Chelsea off the ropes for momentum, then turns to hit a sitout powerbomb! That’s when Jonna collapses herself; unaware Zoey tagged herself in when Chelsea ricocheted off the top rope. She climbs the turnbuckle for a Watching For Comets (inverted 450) attempt only for Jonna to roll towards her sister’s corner. Jamie tags in and sees Zoey somehow further the flip to land on her feet in a spectacular display that gets the crowd’s approval! In all the excitement, she doesn’t notice when Jamie hits her Hell On Heels (roundhouse kick) straight for Zoey’s jaw! Belle falls back into the ropes, then gets hit with a second Hell On Heels (roundhouse kick) that spins her around and wraps the ropes around her arms! With her opponent locked in place, Jamie lets Chelsea stay in place for a little while so Jamie can rest. That’s when Zoey shouts something lewd that the microphones miss, though it’s obvious she’s taunting her opponent to hit her again! Jamie obliges with the third Hell On Heels (roundhouse kick), which untangles Zoey Belle from the ropes and knocks her ringside!
Daewon: Zo might regret taunting her opponent after that series of kicks.
VIP: Getting wrapped up in those ropes is no laughing matter. And I’m not referring to an old three hundred pounder’s moonsault, either.
Belle’s out cold near the apron when Jamie approaches with a confident smile. She lays into Zoey with kicks and stomps, then gets in position for her Hate and Love signature move (standing moonsault double knee drop). But, when her knees connect, it’s not with Zoey — it’s with Chelsea, who dove on top of her teammate to protect her!
Daewon: Excellent teamwork! And teamwork makes the dream work. Isn’t that right, VIP?
VIP: Excellent? She hurt herself and put her partner in harm’s way for the potential double team, and you call that teamwork? What would you know, have you ever been inside of a ring? Shut up Sax--err I mean Daewon!
Daewon: You don’t have to be a wrestler to understand common sense.
Jamie then decides to lift Chelsea into a Liar's Poison (pumphandle powerbomb) with the intent of hitting it on top of Zoey, except Skye breaks out of it before she can hoist her! Then, Chelsea locks in her Rage of the Heavens signature (cross arm breaker) submission! The armbar in full effect, she pulls back as hard as she can while Jamie cries out in pain! Jonna breaks up the pin with a dive of her own, but the damage looks like it’s already done.
Chelsea and Jonna keep fighting at ringside when Zoey Belle and Jamie Austin slowly climb back into the ring. After a moment of both opponents knocked out on opposite sides of the ring, the referee’s count reaches seven when both of them start to recover. However, whether by luck or determination, it’s Zoey who gets to her feet first when she locks in her Ad Finem (cattle mutilation) submission finisher that makes Jamie tap.
WINNER: ZOEY BELLE & CHELSEA SKYE!!
Chelsea and Zoey celebrate on the turnbuckles, getting the crowd involved with arm gestures and smiles!
VIP: Now that’s some hearty back-and-forth to start the show. A big moment for Zoey and Chelsea in their Epoch debuts! Even if they did make some questionable decisions.
Daewon: I, for one, think both teams did terrific! I’m excited to see more from these four on Epoch and SRW’s other two great shows.
VIP: Did you leave the vacuum cleaner on, because I swear I just heard a loud sucking noise.
Daewon: Vacuum cleaner? I don’t have a—
VIP: That’s okay, it was a rhetorical question, you don’t need to answer, Day One. Folks, we all know the holidays can be rough on us, especially as inflation continues to ravage the world’s economy. But you know what I did to ease my holiday spending? I listened to this next sponsor and switched to GEICO, and I even saved more than fifteen percent by doing that! Check ‘em out, and see if you can’t save too.
Daewon: Tonight’s competitors might need insurance after what’s to come!!
Chelsea and Zoey celebrate on the turnbuckles, getting the crowd involved with arm gestures and smiles!
VIP: Now that’s some hearty back-and-forth to start the show. A big moment for Zoey and Chelsea in their Epoch debuts! Even if they did make some questionable decisions.
Daewon: I, for one, think both teams did terrific! I’m excited to see more from these four on Epoch and SRW’s other two great shows.
VIP: Did you leave the vacuum cleaner on, because I swear I just heard a loud sucking noise.
Daewon: Vacuum cleaner? I don’t have a—
VIP: That’s okay, it was a rhetorical question, you don’t need to answer, Day One. Folks, we all know the holidays can be rough on us, especially as inflation continues to ravage the world’s economy. But you know what I did to ease my holiday spending? I listened to this next sponsor and switched to GEICO, and I even saved more than fifteen percent by doing that! Check ‘em out, and see if you can’t save too.
Daewon: Tonight’s competitors might need insurance after what’s to come!!
We are backstage at the world-renown Ross Kelly Rodeo Pasadena arena where the largest yorkshireman you have ever seen, Winston Dyson-Millar seated on a steel chair, his features express a calm at ease demeanour, yet there was an underlying tense feel to it all as if he could snap at any given moment when the camera spots him.
WMD: November 25th 2021 is the second Epoch in the history of Southern Rebellion Wrestling, and the oldest member of this organization goes to Main Event the whole show after falling short, (no pun intended) against the now former and single most dominant champion SRW has seen for quite a while. Not too bad for an old Brighouse lad in his 70s, I’d say. I harbor no resentment towards Ursula Von Rossbach. She set a goal for herself, picked me as a target, and fulfilled her task. Whether it was right or wrong in the traditional sense is irrelevant. I lost to her but managed to get my way back to the bright lights of SRW, and it speaks volumes that after my latest match in my age and with the years I have in this business, I am still good enough to Main Event a show for you lot in here with decades since my debut, I’d like to see the rest of the old geezers try to pull that shite off.
He leans back a bit and chuckles, a sight of humour mixed with pride as the man speaks on.
WMD: Now I am an old man, can’t deny it, and I can’t deny the fact that the world has changed a lot since I started my career in the squared circle. The business itself has changed even more, which is acceptable. However, if you expect me to sit here and babble on about how women have no place in the ring or how only certain types of wrestlers should be considered the ones suitable to succeed, then you are sorely mistaken. Look at my previous opponent. Ursie is as tough as any man, and in most cases, she is probably tougher. You wanna tell her she has no business being in the ring? Go right ahead and hope you end up getting the same nice nurses I got laid out in the hospital after facing her. Another great example is my boy CCM looks nothing like the traditional portrayal of a wrestler, yet you could bend, twist and turn you to a damn human pretzel despite weighing maybe buck fifty soaking wet and change in his pockets.. So when discussing my opponent tonight. Esme Thunder: I have to be honest not just to you lot watching but her as well.
He crosses his arms across that broad chest supporting a SRW t-shirt with sleeves ripped off from it.
WMD: For months, I have without rest taunted and poked at Mrs. Thunder, and my behavior along with the chosen words about her and her husband have been at the very least questionable, but there was a clear method to this madness. I did it as a favour for you, Esme, yup you can thank me later if you wish. Truth of the matter is that I am a happily married man, father of one, and grandfather of two, so why would I need to get lewd and greasy towards a married woman on live television? Well, the answer is quite simple; because it annoyed the bloody hell out of her husband. Esme luv, your biggest obstacle in this industry has not been gatekeeping men who didn’t want women in their clubhouse. It hasn’t been your opponents who have never heard of or chosen to conveniently forget your accomplishments outside the duties of a manager and valet to your husband. I’m no avid wrestling historian myself or a scholar of your career history, but you’ve competed in tag matches alongside that brute you call your husband, even held some championship gold in the process. You have competed against people who among others include such names as Camilla Pazzini and Colleen Harmon nay Chambers from her earlier days..you even competed against a pair of Samoan upstarts in Silo Clarke and one simply known as Kiuga..just to list a few. I’ve seen those matches, albeit in questionable quality and through nefarious sources but regardless. I have seen what you are capable of, and the biggest opponent and obstacle I see standing between you and your actual success in this business is simple; it’s your dear hubby.
He flashes a smirk across his face.
WMD: Nothing against Luthie, the lad is capable, callous, and cruel beyond any measurements. Imagine getting so bent out of shape over losing a debut match that he chose to take a steel bat to yours truly. Hell, I say nothing against him, but who am I kidding, I got everything against him. He is a brute, a bully, and if I may say so, in my layman opinion, at the very least, a sociopath when it comes to targeting others. You may love him. He may even love you back if he’s capable of that, but the way he behaves when you are amongst yourselves may differ largely from how he acts around you or on his own, depending if the camera is on or off him. I don’t trust that bugger further than I can throw him and taunting you, mocking you, making advances towards you, riled him up. Made that bull see red and lose any sense he had, I’d say it was worth the beating and berating in the end, because as much as he is a despicable dutch bellend, he has a method to his madness, and he provides success, but for someone of your talent and skills to just babysit him during his match..that is a criminal waste of not just your career but the chances of what you could have accomplished. So tonight, I get to face someone who I consider the better out of the two Thunders in SRW, why? Well, I’ve seen what you are capable of, I’ve seen Luther lose to my son..twice, I’ve lost to UVR, but so did your dearly beloved dutch boy..and if we look at the success rate of the two people, we’ve watched over from ringside..my boy is the OVERDRIVE AND KING OF THE SOUTH CHAMPION..where oh where is Luther’s gold pray tell? So considering he’s probably held out somewhere nursing his burns from CODA, you and I get a chance to show just what being in the Main Event means in SRW. You get a chance to debut, clear the table of all the debris of doubt but don’t count me out, sweetheart. This isn’t my first rodeo against a woman who can snap a lesser man in half..
He chuckles at the pun on the arena’s nickname he managed to drop along the speech.
WMD: I may be your first legit opponent in SRW, but if you don’t watch it, I may just be your last as well, and if that happens, Esme, do you dare to go back to ringside watching others succeed, knowing you couldn’t even beat an old-timer like me? You are risking a lot for this biscuit of being your own woman, blazing your own trail and me? Oh, I’m calm like a bomb, and they don’t call me WMD just because of my initials but the destruction I leave at my wake. I’ll see you in the ring Mrs. T. Ta-ta, toodlepip, and cheerio!
He waves at the camera happily as the show moves on.
Daewon: What do we think of Winston, VIP? He might be up there in age, but no one can deny he’s a legend in this business!
VIP: Did this company really provide television time, and a main event spotlight, to a seventy year old man? I’m all for creative exhibitions, but for a company’s success, shouldn’t we be advocating for the youth of this company to our future? What business sense does it make, what will a WMD really bring to the table, in the future? Surely he’s not going to be selling pay-per-views and DVDs or even t-shirts in a year, neigh six months time even, right?
Daewon: He can still go! He taught our new King Of The Jungle Champion CCM all he knows, as far as I know. You’re just bitter the spotlight’s not on you tonight.
VIP: ...let’s go to ringside, where our crew has set up everything in place for our next match; the Thanksgiving Food Fight match!
THANKSGIVING FOOD FIGHT TRIPLE THREAT MATCH
JUSTICE CROSS VS MEG COLEMAN VS OLIVIA BLUE
When the match begins, Olivia Blue’s music hasn’t hit, and she’s nowhere to be seen. So instead, Justice Cross and Meg Coleman square off in the ring surrounded by tables of traditional Thanksgiving food. Cross already has a delicious-looking pumpkin pie in her hands brought from home. As soon as the bell rings, Two Belt Justice throws her pastry at Meg, who fails to duck in time! Megan’s knocked down from the impact, and when she sits up, Justice runs at her with a shining wizard in mind! She tries to kick Meg’s pie-covered face, but Coleman lies down again to make Cross whiff! A drop toehold hunches the double tag team champ over the bottom rope to see the third member of the match, Olivia Blue, stuffing food from the tables at ringside into her wheeled insulated cooler.
VIP: Look, she’s trying to pack her own dinner on the company’s dime!
Daewon: Nothing wrong with being prepared! That’s what the Boy Scouts taught me.
VIP: Why am I not surprised you’re a Boy Scout...I bet you didn’t even make it past First Class...
Daewon: I’ll have you know, I collected more than fifty badges. One of which was given to me after I helped an old lady cross the street.
VIP: ………………………………...
Distracted, Justice gets hit with Megan’s Headache signature (running knee) to the back of the head and crumples to the mat. She tries to follow up with a Meg Kick, but Justice dodges by rolling out of the ring at the last possible moment. She glances at one of the tables topped with all the festive fixings, but with her back turned, Olivia Blue pushes her insulated cooler hard right into Cross’s legs! Justice flips onto the dirt ringside as dust billows around her when Megan combos it up by bouncing onto the top rope with a high-angle senton bomb plancha that leaves them both coughing up the brown sand mixed with clay!
Daewon: In this time of uncertainty and woe, what are you most thankful for, Vance?
VIP: I’m thankful for the neverending VIP Academy Awards and Southern Belt Collector tour, and being that much better than you, Day One!
Daewon: ... I regret asking.
VIP: No you don’t.
The crowd starts to chant, “WE WANT TURKEY! WE WANT TURKEY!” when Olivia looks around to acknowledge their suggestion! She picks up the large bird cooked to perfection with both hands and winds up. When she swings for the fences, the moist centerpiece collides with a rising Megan Coleman! The crowd passionately cheers as Meg stumbles closer to the table, followed by a second shot straight across Justice’s cheek! With all that done, Blue grabs a gravy boat and pours it onto the other two competitors with a playful grin. Throwing the bowl itself at Justice, the ceramic shatters before Olivia climbs up onto the apron. Jumping off with a flying crossbody attempt, she gets caught when a recovered Justice Cross nails a devastating Kamikaze (apron hung DDT) onto Olivia’s cooler! Climbing onto the apron herself, she looks at Megan, intending to put her through the Thanksgiving feast table, when a groggy Coleman joins Justice onto the apron.
VIP: This crowd wanted turkey, and they got it! But look at Meg and Justice, they just collided onto the apron! That’s the hardest part of the ring y’know. Do you think they’ll be taken to a local medical facility after this?
Daewon: I surely hope not! I’m a big fan of all three of these competitors, but it looks like one of them might come crashing into the Thanksgiving table! Oh no!
VIP: Just steer clear of the candied yams. I will not tolerate abuse of the sweet potatoes!
The two fight back and forth, trading blows as both competitors teeter close to falling into the table below. Justice prepares to take advantage of the opening by trying for her Lights Out (jumping cutter) finisher into the meal, but Megan, with a last gasp of energy, pushes her back and lands a superman punch! Justice falls off the apron, over the cooler, and lands back-first into the platter!! Food flies everywhere while wood shards splinter off the plywood!!
Deawon: Oh my God!!
VIP: At least the mashed potatoes broke her fall!
Megan limps towards Olivia Blue and tosses her back into the ring. The fan-favorite then grabs a can of cranberry sauce off the floor and rolls under the ropes. Blue starts to stumble to her feet, dazed and out of it when Meg runs at her at full speed! She jumps and swings the metal can at Olivia’s head when - to everyone’s surprise - Olivia ducks it! She rolls Megan up! Coleman only barely kicks out at 2.9!
Daewon: Are you impressed with Megan’s determination?
VIP: Those cranberries would have put anyone out. Lucky Olivia ducked it, or we’d be looking at a winner right now!
Olivia tries to finish the job with an Outta Da Blue (running blockbuster), but Megan stands, jumps, and rocks the running rookie with her own momentum behind her with a superman punch! Then, Megan drops down to hook the leg.
WINNER: MEG COLEMAN!!
Coleman celebrates in the ring to the sounds of cheers.
Daewon: Congratulations, Meg! And congratulations to everyone else in this match. What a great job!
VIP: Megan...PAWNCH! ...That just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
Daewon: Maybe not, but I think I speak for all of us at SRW Epoch when I say… We’re thankful for the people at home and in attendance who watch and support us every month.
VIP: We here at SRW are as thankful for those people as I know I am, for Stove Top Stuffing. Not just because they were gracious enough to sponsor us this show, but because, if it’s not Stove Top, it’s not Thanksgiving. Might as well call them Campbell’s cause it’s Mmm, Mmm Good. Now roll that beautiful stuffing footage!
Daewon: We're not sponsored by Campbell's.
VIP: Yet.
VIP: Look, she’s trying to pack her own dinner on the company’s dime!
Daewon: Nothing wrong with being prepared! That’s what the Boy Scouts taught me.
VIP: Why am I not surprised you’re a Boy Scout...I bet you didn’t even make it past First Class...
Daewon: I’ll have you know, I collected more than fifty badges. One of which was given to me after I helped an old lady cross the street.
VIP: ………………………………...
Distracted, Justice gets hit with Megan’s Headache signature (running knee) to the back of the head and crumples to the mat. She tries to follow up with a Meg Kick, but Justice dodges by rolling out of the ring at the last possible moment. She glances at one of the tables topped with all the festive fixings, but with her back turned, Olivia Blue pushes her insulated cooler hard right into Cross’s legs! Justice flips onto the dirt ringside as dust billows around her when Megan combos it up by bouncing onto the top rope with a high-angle senton bomb plancha that leaves them both coughing up the brown sand mixed with clay!
Daewon: In this time of uncertainty and woe, what are you most thankful for, Vance?
VIP: I’m thankful for the neverending VIP Academy Awards and Southern Belt Collector tour, and being that much better than you, Day One!
Daewon: ... I regret asking.
VIP: No you don’t.
The crowd starts to chant, “WE WANT TURKEY! WE WANT TURKEY!” when Olivia looks around to acknowledge their suggestion! She picks up the large bird cooked to perfection with both hands and winds up. When she swings for the fences, the moist centerpiece collides with a rising Megan Coleman! The crowd passionately cheers as Meg stumbles closer to the table, followed by a second shot straight across Justice’s cheek! With all that done, Blue grabs a gravy boat and pours it onto the other two competitors with a playful grin. Throwing the bowl itself at Justice, the ceramic shatters before Olivia climbs up onto the apron. Jumping off with a flying crossbody attempt, she gets caught when a recovered Justice Cross nails a devastating Kamikaze (apron hung DDT) onto Olivia’s cooler! Climbing onto the apron herself, she looks at Megan, intending to put her through the Thanksgiving feast table, when a groggy Coleman joins Justice onto the apron.
VIP: This crowd wanted turkey, and they got it! But look at Meg and Justice, they just collided onto the apron! That’s the hardest part of the ring y’know. Do you think they’ll be taken to a local medical facility after this?
Daewon: I surely hope not! I’m a big fan of all three of these competitors, but it looks like one of them might come crashing into the Thanksgiving table! Oh no!
VIP: Just steer clear of the candied yams. I will not tolerate abuse of the sweet potatoes!
The two fight back and forth, trading blows as both competitors teeter close to falling into the table below. Justice prepares to take advantage of the opening by trying for her Lights Out (jumping cutter) finisher into the meal, but Megan, with a last gasp of energy, pushes her back and lands a superman punch! Justice falls off the apron, over the cooler, and lands back-first into the platter!! Food flies everywhere while wood shards splinter off the plywood!!
Deawon: Oh my God!!
VIP: At least the mashed potatoes broke her fall!
Megan limps towards Olivia Blue and tosses her back into the ring. The fan-favorite then grabs a can of cranberry sauce off the floor and rolls under the ropes. Blue starts to stumble to her feet, dazed and out of it when Meg runs at her at full speed! She jumps and swings the metal can at Olivia’s head when - to everyone’s surprise - Olivia ducks it! She rolls Megan up! Coleman only barely kicks out at 2.9!
Daewon: Are you impressed with Megan’s determination?
VIP: Those cranberries would have put anyone out. Lucky Olivia ducked it, or we’d be looking at a winner right now!
Olivia tries to finish the job with an Outta Da Blue (running blockbuster), but Megan stands, jumps, and rocks the running rookie with her own momentum behind her with a superman punch! Then, Megan drops down to hook the leg.
WINNER: MEG COLEMAN!!
Coleman celebrates in the ring to the sounds of cheers.
Daewon: Congratulations, Meg! And congratulations to everyone else in this match. What a great job!
VIP: Megan...PAWNCH! ...That just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
Daewon: Maybe not, but I think I speak for all of us at SRW Epoch when I say… We’re thankful for the people at home and in attendance who watch and support us every month.
VIP: We here at SRW are as thankful for those people as I know I am, for Stove Top Stuffing. Not just because they were gracious enough to sponsor us this show, but because, if it’s not Stove Top, it’s not Thanksgiving. Might as well call them Campbell’s cause it’s Mmm, Mmm Good. Now roll that beautiful stuffing footage!
Daewon: We're not sponsored by Campbell's.
VIP: Yet.
MAIN EVENT
SINGLES MATCH
ESME THUNDER VS WINSTON DYSON-MILLAR w/ CCM
SINGLES MATCH
ESME THUNDER VS WINSTON DYSON-MILLAR w/ CCM
We are at the world-renown Ross Kelly Rodeo Arena, also known as “The Rodeo” after a night full of hard-hitting Epoch Entertainment and Assaulting Action, it’s time for the MAIN EVENT of the evening. The crowd is loud and livid after a set of spectacular showdowns from earlier in the night. Esme Thunder comes out to the thunderous opening of “We don’t need a cure” by Hardcore Superstar, the amped-up crowd sings along to the simple chorus, the usual manager and valet seems to come alive at the reactions of the crowd, making her way to the ring, taking few moments to soak it up, take some selfies with fans and slapping hands before reluctantly getting to the ring instead of just partying it up with the crowd.
Daewon: Thoughts on Esme tonight? Is she ready?
VIP: Final Countdown was my first moment seeing Esme in my young career. This is the first match. So honestly, I can’t say that I know, because I don’t.
Esme leans against a corner turnbuckle rolling her shoulders and getting ready as “Kashmir” by Led Zeppelin blares out and what we see first is the Overdrive Champion and brand new KING OF THE SOUTH CHAMPION: C.C.M. One championship over each of his shoulders, he flex taunts the crowd gesturing to behind him, and when the towering presence of his father Winston Millar-Dyson or WMD as the fans and haters know him. The big man holds up a single fist roaring out as his son talks smack, yapping on about how the Millar genetics are just too strong to be kept down and not a single solitary member of the crowd could have a chance to be as a great as they are. Then, in the ring, Esme holds up her hands in the ring, gesturing at the two brits to “GET ON WITH IT!”
Daewon: Winston says no one in the crowd… and presumably, no one in the announcer’s booth, will ever be as good as the Millar family. He’s calling you out, VIP.
VIP: I think he needs to settle down and take his geritol before he says something he’s gonna regret.
Some words are exchanged between Esme and CCM. He is reading her the riot act when WMD pushes his son back and smiles at Esme, gesturing at her to step back a bit. The hulking Yorkshire native rolls his joints, takes a few heavy breaths startling his son, who jumps back, but instead of an explosive sprint, sees the big man slowly stroll his way in tapping his temple, while his son howls out loud for the stupidity of the fans who totally believed the man in his seventies would run to the ring. Esme Thunder, however, reacts to the rouse, holding the ropes for the older Millar, helpfully gesturing him to take his time. This gets the crowd to erupt in cheers as CCM tells them to respect their elders and a British LEGEND (a moment of realization seems to hit) as he adds “oh, and my dad’s here too!”
VIP: Why. You haven’t given me a reason to follow such a one-sided decree. Yet. Show me something.
As the ref calls for the bell, the two wrestlers size each other up. Couple of circles, Esme suggesting a test of strength, and WMD agrees except his hands being a bit higher than hers, he smirks at her apologetically, and she shrugs, stomping on his foot. The big man wobbles back, and as Esme rushes to attack him, he lifts up a boot. She connects with his knee instead of the boot, bone on bone sends her back, and the veteran growls. Stomping his way to the dazed debutant, and grabs her for a massive sidewalk slam!
As CCM cheers his dad on, we see the two go on for a decent exchange between the two wrestlers brawling for position of power, upperhand exchanges along the dueling chants of “WMD” and “MRS. T!” (the former mostly shouted by CCM and some jaded know-it-alls in the crowd). Despite the obvious weight and size difference, Esme doesn’t seem too intimidated by her opponent, who on the other hand seems to be on the lookout to teach a lesson of just what happens to those who make the mistake of getting in the ring with him. While the injuries suffered against UVR may have been still nagging and weighing the big man down, Winston does his best to hide it. Esme, who seems more than comfortable with throwing hands and elbows at his opponent even if her targets are more to the big man’s rib cage and Winston is looking to target her head, we see some weaning and bobbing head movement, which takes out some steam from the elder Millar’s punches, he goes for a bearhug, and Esme drops down diving the cling around those massive legs. She clenches on tight using her own weight as a leverage to unbalance Winston, who goes to drop elbows to the crown of Esme, sadly for him, Mrs. T manages to unhinge his balance enough to topple the big man more down to size, and while he swings wildly at her, she already jumps up to her feet and starts stomping at those long limbs in a stick and move type motion which keeps her just out of the reach of kicks and swings between her attacks.
Seeing enough, CCM jumps on the apron, starting to berate Esme.
Daewon: CCM shouldn’t be getting involved, Vance! This isn’t his match! You don’t see Luther coming to the aid of Esme, do you?
VIP: Unless he’s afraid his old man can’t get the job done, he should leave the match alone. Look at my matches, do I ever have anyone’s assistance? Do better, CCM.
Daewon: As much as it pains me to admit it… No. You cheat in other ways.
VIP: Are you saying I’m a cheat? I have you know, no one has found the combination to my sweet reverse chinlock yet...that’s why I keep using it.
Daewon: Uh huh...
Esme takes her focus out of the laid out WMD, and goes to jaw-jack with the Yorkshire Terror.
Daewon: Esme is showing her inexperience here.
VIP: Rule number one of the Official Pro Wrestling Rulebook™, you never take your eyes off your opponent. It only takes three seconds to lose a match.
Unbeknownst to her, WMD is getting back up and aims up his stronger foot. He takes a few paces of speed before rushing at the back of Esme, who sees CCM drop down and dangling from the top rope, but before she gets a chance to turn, WMD boots her to the back and with the top rope lowered by CCM’s weight sends her tumbling to ringside. CCM hops away, claiming to the ref that he did nothing while WMD roars, stepping over the ropes, and hops over to ringside.
Daewon: This is our SRW King Of The South Champion, guys?! This scoundrel of a man who lies to the referee and flagrantly breaks the rules?! He should be stripped of his title right now.
VIP: He must be concerned for his old man not being able to get the job done...
Official starts to count as WMD drags Esme to the corner-post. He sets her up in an elevated position on the apron and dives in with shoulder tackles, once, twice, three times to the gut knocking the air out of her as the official keeps counting them.
THREE!
FOUR!
FIVE!
Crowd roars out as WMD climbs to the apron, dragging Esme up by the ring gear, he perches her on to the top turnbuckle. She seems out of it. We see genuine concern on the face of CCM as his dad roars out to the crowd: “YOU LOT WANNA SEE SOMETHING BRUTAL, HUH?!”
Daewon: No!! Whatever you’re doing, don’t do it!
VIP: Show me. Don’t just talk about it, be about it...
Gingerly, he gets up on top of the turnbuckle and grabs Esme, yanking her up. Then in a blink of an eye, Mrs. T comes alive and manages to trip the big man’s footing on the wobbly setting. He clings to her, she clings to him, and both of them land from the top turnbuckle in what looked like a cross of an attempted superplex and a really bad fall!
Daewon: Oh no!! This could be bad!
VIP: This is why big people shouldn’t go up top. They could have exploded the ring on that landing. I think I’ve seen that twice or thrice after all...
Daewon: Are you weight shaming WMD right now?
VIP: Of course not. It’s simple physics, though. Those cables are made to support a set weight, the ring made to absorb impact. But too much impact and well...I mean, rings aren’t indestructible.
Daewon: I suppose that’s true...
Both wrestlers are back in the ring, but neither seems to be moving. The official checks on them, starting to count. CCM is pounding the apron like a madman yelling at his dad to get the bloody hell up as the crowd seems to be chanting for Mrs. T.
Daewon: Will this match end in a double countout? What a terrible ending to Epoch that would be…
VIP: Who would end a show on a countout? What is this, Stamford?
For a few counts, the pair of them seem completely out, then stirring, they are starting to get up, Esme, with some shaky feet and WMD with a roll to the corner to help himself up by the turnbuckles. The pair of them make it up in time, but the fall clearly takes some fight out of both, makes their movement, and attacks somewhat sluggish. WMD favors his foot that got stomped on earlier. It looks like he might have landed a bit badly on it with the fall.
VIP: Circling back to my previous point, had he not gone up there, he wouldn’t have landed in such a way. Look at him hobbling. That was...downright Vicious. *cheeky smirk to the camera*
Daewon: Do you think he might have sprained his ankle or twisted his knee wrong in that fall?
VIP: If he wants to win, I certainly hope not.
Esme staggers back, yelling at WMD to come and finish her if he can. Millar rushes at her. In an odd display, he does manage to nab her close. She slips around and goes for the bad leg, and executes a drop toehold. WMD loses his balance going down as Esme adds on the pressure with a leglock. She manages to hold it on a bit, but she didn’t lock it in tight enough after the wobbly standing, so WMD manages to power himself out of it. Damage being done already, he drags his foot a bit, putting more weight on the better foot. Esme backs up as WMD is trying to sturdy his footing, punching on the weaker leg to get some sense back in it before Esme lands a devastating chop block knocking the big man down.
Daewon: Oh! Esme is really targeting the leg here.
VIP: The tried and true giantkiller tactic.
WMD scampers, trying to reach for the ropes, and does! He’s crawled for them just in time, using them to leverage himself upwards before he manages to get to his feet fully, WMD hears what sounds like a truck horn in the air, and as he turns around to see where his opponent is, Esme had just executed the truck horn taunt. She rushed at him, hitting her finisher! THUMBS DOWN (Samoan Spike) right to the throat of the big man sending him down. Without hesitation, Esme goes for the pin, and the official drops down for the count.
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
WINNER: ESME THUNDER!!
After the match, Esme gets her hand raised and goes to celebrate with the rowdy crowd as CCM dives in to check on his dad!
VIP: A thumb to the throat is enough to take anyone of any size down. What a great equalizer.
Daewon: Yeah! And the crowd loved it too! What a way to end our second episode of Epoch!
VIP: Everyone, that’s all for us, we’ll see you in December for Christmas, Epoch style! Tell your friends, chat it up on social media, for Daewon, I’m Vance Isaac Parker, your host with the most, signing off!
Daewon: Ta-ta, toodlepip, and cheerio!
VIP: ...If you say that again, you’re fired. We’ll see you next time, folks!